So you know how my dissenters will sometimes say I have an overwrought and almost sick need to out celebrities? Well, if you don’t know now you know! They’ve been saying it and, yes, more importantly, I have dissenters. People are actually reading this blog! I wish they would just have the balls to post their sentiments publicly. Alas, they don’t!
So to appease them… or displease them rather… this is yet another outing!!! I was never one to acquiesce. Let’s call the outing victim Magic Dragon (it will make sense soon).
See, I don’t give names! It’s not my fault that I have very savvy readers who could decode my thinly veiled blind items in a matter of seconds! Who knew my readers were so smart!?!? I for sure didn’t!!! Now wipe that dribble off your faces, guys, the yellow bus is waiting!
I have to preface this week’s particular outing by writing that I do not get off on outing celebrities — quite the contrary really… Though I must admit I haven’t had to squeeze the cannoli since I started this blog… I kid,I kid…
Celebs are America’s royalty. You have heard that argument before, I gather. Well, it’s true! I know, I know, it’s sad but true. We live for insight into their lives, want to know they put one sock on at a time, want to know they scratch their balls like the rest of us (right, Sis? Well… Transsssis?!?!)
We don’t have kings, queens, next-in-lines, castaways but we surely have Brangelina, Tom-Kat and… and… Worrakell. (That last one was my little ditty or portmanteau [for my advanced degree awardees]! It’s Kelly Osbourne and her new beau Luke Worrall… I know, I know, you could care less and what’s worse they’re British. Still I made that up on my own. Kudos to me! Worrakell. I like that! I am contacting the Post… or Star… you know, the reputable rags!)
Anyhoo, so getting insight into celebs’ personal lives is interesting — especially if it involves some sexual proclivity they aren’t too keen on divulging. It’s like that uncle you know who dresses in women’s clothing and you are dying to tell his wife and kids at the dinner table during Thanksgiving so you disguise his name (Tony for Toni or something like that) and spill the beans. Or is that just me? I guess I am just evil!
Oh yeah… the outing… I digressed again. Check the outing in my next entry. I think it needs its own post and I promise I will get “straight” to the point. That pun was soooo intended by the way!